A group of Catholic priests were due to play a group of rabbis in an important
inter-faith game. A few days before the match, disaster struck. The Catholic team's
star player broke his ankle and the doctor said he wouldn't be able to play again
for at least two months.
"What are we going to do? moaned Father Durnford.
"Well," said Father Thomas, "it so happens that Alan Shearer
is a good friend of mine. We could ask him to play for us."
"But that wouldn't be ethical, now would it?" said Father Durnford.
"No, but if we called him Father Shearer, no one need know," replied
Eventually Father Durnford agreed to let this devious plan go ahead but then,
as luck would have it, he was suddenly called away on official Church business
and was unable to watch the match. As soon as he could, he phoned Father Thomas
for the result.
"I'm afraid they beat us, five-one," said Father Thomas.
"But how could that happen?" queried Father Durnford. "We had
Father Shearer in our team."
"Yes," said Father Thomas, "but they had Rabbi Ince and Rabbi
Gascoigne playing for them."